Monday, December 19, 2005
There seemed to be someone following us all the time, tailing us wherever we go, staring at us whatever we do. NO peace, no calmness, no serenity and no freedom of our own. There was just something which separates us from who we are and what we are. Not what we gladly like to do, just that it is sometimes beyond our control. It was pure disgust at first, but i learnt to adapt. Perhaps what we have been through is nothing compared to the torment you had undergone. But is this kind of revenge or smth? Venting your anger on us? then when will that hatred begin to cease to exist? Giving everyone a break? Is it bound to pass down generations after generations? LIke walking down a path with no beginning and an end? It was never a wrong decision. My passion has changed to apprehension. if only you knew. Things were never that simple. I really hope we can rightfully earn a break. Private or public? could we at least yearn for some privacy? we had not rights of our own everywhere we are, im totally speechless, and utterly helpless. We have to accpet that fact but could we be wilful and ask for somthing simple? something which everyone of us yearn for? a rest? just a clean break? which can really let us settle down and talk things out? It can really drive us to the wall, walking down and endless path is already draining out my inexhuastible energy, and the mental and physical exhaustion is really making me drop dead on the floor. There's no reason for me to bear any hatred or sorrows. Since when we had any?but there is a reason for us to be asking for the same thing which we could never get. i wonder. does the fault really lies with us or you? perhaps neither. Deep down in our hearts, we know, we were never meant for each other. Just hope that the sun would be shinely brightly once again, let the rain cease and the rainbow shall appear. wil there be a day anyway?i've learnt to let it all go and swallow everything. But being wrongly accused is something i could never accept. YOu jolly well know that it was never me in your eyes. No matter what you say, your actions dont tally. Sometimes, its not just those sweet talking words that heal wonders. Its that tiny actions that couts, that really shatters my heart. but i dont mind. it is really me. i do what i have to do. it was really never me. and everytime the fault lies with me. everyone around me, everyone associated with me. wrong company? or bad host? naughty daughter? or mainly my character? you pick. it really made those hot trickling tears fall out of place. i really have nothing to drown my sorrows in. Is it really my fault?could someone at least give me an explanation why is everything taking its toll on me? If i were to name all of them, it would be an never ending list. i could only let it go. yes, let it all go. perhaps. but i really cant.this is fated. it always is. is this for jocularity? playing a prank on me? i really want a break. a real break. PLEASE. is that too much im asking for?Please, pull me out of this reality and bring me back to where i truly belong....*fighting with inexhaustible energy, to escape from the hands of reality.**the rain just keeps on falling...*
-drowning in an abyss of ignorance.
="true">
