Tuesday, September 13, 2005
Was it my impulsiveness or inflexibility? Was it my temper or my tolerance?Was it my fault or yours?It was definately not the first time. Using it as a menace to you did not just happened once. But sometimes, i must admit that people do have a certain limit where they can still tolerate and talk with jocularity about switiching it off. The test is you have to know when is the time to keep to your promise.I seemed to be reprimanding when i'm at fault? am i in the first place? contradicting.Call it my impulsiveness. "this kinda attitude will get you beaten up outside".Is it better to be hated or getting beaten? Both are equally disastrous and disruptive. Neither has good endings. Something ominous is bound to happen. However, it's rather palpable that getting beaten would be of the two, the worst.Have you ever tried putting your shoes in mine? Nagging and waiting and wailing and begging while brushing off your nonsensical words of "wait" and "a while more".If you were me, would you rather wait or would you be fed up and stomp around OR would you beat someone up?I dared not think of the consequences. Though it's always better to think it positively. My very third time. How do you expect me to trust you? The respect is already gone. There's no longer a win-win situation. Not because i am not willing to compromise. BUt it is partly your hot headedness if i were to be frank. Try getting threaten with an iron fist. See if you rather wait or rather do something drastic.Perhaps something has indeed got into me. Upmteen chances, numerous warnings, endless admonishments. Did you ever take it to heart? If there was this very minority chance that i would get one, why would i still fight over it? If i have nothing at hand, why would i risk my life to use it? if i have nothing better to do, why would i rather bear the consequences though time and time again, it leaves me nothing but misery and hatred?A cruelty knot borne by both love and hatred. or rather. A knot hardening into one bearing hatred and detest. a pain in the neck? or pure irritating and unconsiderate?Should i push the blame to myself say "i deserve it".or should i say it was partly your fault?I seriously have no idea. Lost in myriad of thought, wonder when to stop and wonder whether you, too , are reflecting upon what you have done.Or was it merely a one way track? Remonstrating me or rather, you, is not going to be help. Complaining to her about my lousy attitude can change everything. an anthema to me? i would rather say its an evidence. To prove how much you both are in alliance against me. Obsession versus necessity.Which will win?Unfortunately, evil will always prevail. Doesn't it?If i have no rights no authority to do anything, and the best way is to sit and wait, how long do i have to wait? if i have not done that, how am i to finish everything at hand?*my point of view*i hate to spetuculate. But i guess this is indubitably the TRUTH. whether or not, it doesn't matter anymore, to me at least. Though logical, think about what other feel.If i already started, how can i stop? a few minutes difference would not kill right? Why can't you just compromise? not as if i'm not going to stop. I have just started not long ago and you don't have to hand in tomorrow right?*your point of view* PERHAPS.If i were to be like you, i would rather not be home.Walking back in melancholy and with trepidation? Do you even care?i doubt so.Since when i have a place in your heart?
-drowning in an abyss of ignorance.
="true">
